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Humor

The cliche is that, “Laughter is the best medicine.” Similar to exercise, it releases endorphins that relax us and make us feel better.  There are many sources for a good laugh, I usually just have to look at myself.  Here is just a smattering of humor to add to your health.  As Charlie Chaplin said, “A day without laughter is a day wasted.”

“That kind of so-called housekeeping where they have six Bibles and no cork-screw.” - Mark Twain

“Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.” - Abraham Lincoln

“A word to the wise isn’t necessary; it's the stupid ones that need the advice.” - Bill Cosby

“The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.” - Albert Einstein

“Girl: Darling this is the happiest day of my life.  Bob Hope: Then why spoil it with a wedding?”

“People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.” - Bob Hope

“As to marriage or celibacy, let a man take which course he will, he will be sure to repent.” - Socrates

“By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.” - Socrates

“If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.” - Mark Twain

“There is a fine line between genius and insanity; I have erased this line.” - Oscar Levant

“Put all thine eggs in one basket and watch that basket”. - Mark Twain

“Meow means woof in cat.” - George Carlin

“Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think -- in a deeper voice.” - Bill Cosby

“By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth” - George Carlin

“Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.” - Emily Dickinson

“You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.” - Mae West

“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” - George Carlin

“Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men, the other 999 follow women” - Groucho Marx

“I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.” - Groucho Marx

“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.” - Charles M. Schulz

“Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.” - Groucho Marx

“What do I think of Western civilisation? I think it would be a very good idea.” - Mahatma Ghandi

“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” - Robin Williams

“The weather forecast for tonight: dark.” - George Carlin

“Have you ever noticed how it's a penny for your thoughts, yet you put in your two cents?  Someone is making a penny on the deal.” - Steven Wright

“I find television very educational.  Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.” - Groucho Marx

 

 

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